Anne of Cleves was King Henry VIII’s fourth wife. After Henry dumped his first wife (Catherine of Aragon), and executed his second (Anne Boleyn), his third wife (Jane Seymour) died of complications from childbirth. This time, however, Henry’s fourth marriage was more about a political alliance rather than lustful attraction or the obsessive need to produce an heir to the throne of the XY variety. It was the king’s chancellor (Thomas Cromwell) who recommended the union to Anne of Cleves, a German (when England was in need of a little German love). When the future couple finally met, all hell broke loose. Although it was too late to back down. Henry purportedly found Anne to be too humorlessly German, unsophisticated, lacking in formal education, and of “middling beautyâ€. But let’s be clear. At this point Henry looked like some grotesque version of Austin Power’s “Fat Bastardâ€. The king tried to back out of the nuptials but it was clear his withdrawal would create damaging political problems for England. Still, the marriage lasted for a mere seven months, and, not surprisingly, Anne of Cleves went along with the annulment (on the grounds of non-consummation). We can’t really blame her. This gal got one of the richest alimony settlements ever! You go girl!
